Swhet Productions

We all have those things that happen right before school starts. Emotions run high, parties slow down, pregnancy test show up positive. But here are 4 things that happen to me every year during summer, mostly before school starts, in no particular order.

4. The dream about missing a class.

I don't know how many people have had this dream, but I get it every year, about a week before school starts. I miss a class because I got side-tracked by a friend, got lost, went in the wrong class room, or ended up fighting dragons with Q-tips... Don't ask. I don't even know. I then find out the next day that I missed the most important lesson of the year... Even though it was the first day. I then drop out of school, join a gang. Start doing drugs. Start selling sex for drugs, or drugs for sex, sometimes I'd sell crack. Then I'd die in a fight with a rival gang, who for some reason has a herd of elephants in the middle of the city. So I'm a little fucked up. Deal with it.

3.The dream at the beginning of the summer that summer is already over.

I always, at the beginning of every summer, have a dream where summer is over, I'm walking to school, the day is cloudy or even rainy, and I'm thinking, "God damn that summer went fast. We didn't even go camping. I could've sworn it's only been a week." Maybe in my dream I was just comatose for the other 7 weeks. But usually it's just because I was asleep.

2. The Facial Deformity

Every goddamn year before school, when picture day is the first day, I get a giant pimple that pops up on my face. In grade 9, it was so fucking big, I had to name it Billy, because I couldn't let it beat me. I still tried to hide it from everyone I saw though. But always, the deformity disappears the next day. Like it was only there to piss me off to begin with.

1. The thought that sometime in the next couple months, a new Halo game is gunna come out that I'm gunna play so hard I'll probably fail at least 1 class.

Almost ever year, for the past 3 years, a new Halo game has come out within the first few months of school. Now, granted, I've never failed a class, I still know that there is a possibility of it fucking me over. Last year was Halo: Reach. Awesome. The year before that, Halo 3: ODST... Meh. This year, Halo: Combat Evolved 10th Anniversary Edition. Say WHAT! Halo has been a part of our hearts and families for almost 10 years? That's right folks. But that's besides the point. Not only is Halo: CE 10th AE coming out in November, Battlefield 3 is coming out in October, and Dead Island, the highly anticipated 4-player co-op zombie survival game is coming out, when? Tomorrow. So the first day of school is also the first day of many to be filled with zombie destroying sexiness.

So that's it. The 4 things that always happen to me during the summer. Any weird things that happen to you before a big annual event? Leave a comment below.